Who's Your Daddy?!?!

The shock of learning that my mild-mannered father was a hard core porn writer was hardly worn off when I got a Sunday morning call from the Left Coast. Now I've got to tell you ... aside from some infrequent emails me and "real" dad don't communicate much. Seeing a California number on caller ID made my heart skip a few beats. My grandmother was in her 90's and I was dreading "THE" phone call.

"Hello..." I answered.

"Hi Mike, it's Dad." he replied.

"Is everything all right?" I ask in my normal, blunt manner.

"Oh, everything's fine. Hope I didn't wake you? Just thought I better get hold of you as soon as I could." he said.

Considering it was maybe 7 in the morning, his time, a lot of alarm bells were going off in my head.

"What's up?" I asked, wondering if I really wanted to know the answer.

He continued "Well, a fella from Texas contacted me yesterday. Said he ran across my name on the internet, did some digging and decided I must be the person he was looking for."

God damn that web site! I was gonna take those pages off and erase every trace of my family history.......

"Turns out I'm listed as his father on his birth certificate."

Pregnant pause then all that came to my head and out of my mouth was "Bummer Dude!"

He went on to tell me about his tryst with a nurse in Korea during his tour of duty. A twelve week love affair between my mother and wife #2 as best I can figure. He reckoned as how the guy could very well be his son.

The reason he was letting me know all this was my new half-brother wanted to contact me since he didn't have any real family and wanted to get to know his half-siblings. Oh joy. I was just shitting my pants with excitement.

We eventually talked, he wanted to know more about "Dad" and was sorely disappointed that I only knew a little more than he did about our common link. Haven't talked to my new half-brother in a long time (I think that's still a coon's age in Texas) and that's just fine, I've got enough going on without strangers popping out of the woodwork.

My wife's only comment was - "I'm holding my breath that the same thing doesn't happen to you!"

Thanks sweetie!